How not to leave the Continental U.S.

1) Start about as far east as you can in Providence, RI

2) Land in Chicago at the beginning of a raging snowstorm with howling winds

3) Get delayed on the runway waiting for a gate to open due to the backlog of planes getting de-iced

4) Try to take off twice on two different flights after sitting on the runway for at least two hours each time, only to be returned to the concourse

5) Spend your 14 hour detour in Chicago in line and on the phone with two different airlines to rearrange your international flight itinerary

6) Sleep for 20-30 minute stints for a total of 2 hours while bored airport employees spend the night "sledding" up and down the terminal while racing each other on luggage carts

7) Get on your long-delayed flight to LAX only to land in a raging rain storm with howling winds

8) Get delayed on the runway

9) 30 hours after you leave home, board your international flight in LAX

10) Sit on the runway while luggage is re-arranged for another hour before take off.

Yes, I am finally in New Zealand!  Joy.  

I got to spend 4 hours in a hotel last night. The shower and ability to lie down vertically between clean sheets were enough to compensate for the short overnight stay.

I did meet a really hot Australian preacher about my age on the plane. He was his way home for winter break from studying at a university in the US. (We are talking Val Kilmer-esque looks here.) We stood at the back of the plane and had this intense conversation about religion and science and the creation of the universe and which is the creator - God's hand or random chance. We could have gone on for hours, but were interrupted by the fasten seatbelt sign and an underpaid, overworked flight attendant. Later, much later, as I was disembarking the plane he came up and chatted with me again and as he's saying farewell he reaches into his bag and I'm thinking he's about to pull out his card and ask that we stay in touch (so I'm getting digits from a cute Aussie, right?) and low and behold my heart drops as I see he is handing me a small pamphlet with the 5 reasons Jesus loves me and how a sinner like me can get to heaven and find eternal salvation. What the?!?!? Honestly, I was embarrassed for him that we couldn't just exchange ideas and respect each other's beliefs. Why'd he have to go and try to convert me? From now on I'm carrying around copies of Barnes' Invertebrate Biology to hand out to wayward preachers in need of guidance to their ultimate destination - laying in a hole in the ground to be recycled back into organic matter. Maybe the chambermaid in room 820 of the Sydney Airport Holiday Inn room will discover the pamphlet in the bathroom garbage can and find her eternal salvation in Jebus. We can only hope.